Andrew Cuomo is Mr. Anonymous (no, not that one)

Ed Koch and Mario Cuomo before a mayoral debate 

New York City, 1977.

With Reggie Jackson calling shots, the race for mayor was on between Cuomo and Koch.

Mario Cuomo had decided that he wanted to be the mayor, before becoming three-time governor of the state. The race against Ed Koch got so close that Cuomo's 19-year-old son Andrew (Andy) got involved.  

Andy was bold, Andy was brash. He wore his hair high, and his collars even higher. One could never have too much starch, after all.  

Andrew Cuomo, circa 1977

But starch was no match for the wrath of Koch, who pummeled Cuomo by nine points, commencing his first of three terms as New York City mayor.

It seems young Andy didn't go down without a fight, however. In the midst of his father losing the Democratic nomination, Andy sunk lower than a rat on the F train by attacking Koch's sex life.

Back then, Koch was in the closet (along with many other 50-something single guys). He certainly didn't need some douchebag outing him in the middle of Queens Boulevard. But that's exactly what Andy Cuomo did, when one Saturday night he and his goons plastered this anonymously written flyer up and down the Boulevard of Death: 

Did Andy do it out of desperation for his father's dying candidacy? 

Probably.

But that doesn't explain, nor extinguish, the raging homophobia inside of young Andy. Fear can win elections, but not before leading to desperate doings.

It was this type of fear that Andy (now Governor Andrew Cuomo) exploited some 30 years later in a desperate attempt to turn the public against New York State teachers. 

Yes, teachers.

Let me explain.  

Cuomo, forgetting that he was a Democrat, tried to "break" the teachers union, who opposed non-unionized charter schools, something Cuomo's wealthy donors could not abide. Teachers were also against someone like Andy Cuomo deciding how they would be evaluated, a draconian, impractical system that is sadly still in place today. 

On New Year's Eve 2014, with teachers protesting outside of his Albany mansion and Mario on his deathbed back home, Cuomo declared:    

I understand the union’s issue; they don’t want anyone fired. But we have teachers that have been found guilty of sexually abusing students who we can’t get out of the classroom. We have a process where literally it takes years and years to get a bad teacher out of the classroom.

The last time this blog checked, New York does not have an epidemic of perverted teachers in classrooms. Sure, there are some, but there are also some perverted priests, doctors, and yes, politicians (see Weiner, Anthony). And if Governor "I used to be the attorney general" Cuomo was aware of "guilty" sex abusers working with children, why didn't he have them arrested, or at the very least, remove their teaching licenses?  

Further, in case you're not convinced that Cuomo wrote the infamous Koch flyer, his words about teachers in 2014 sound remarkably similar to those which polluted Queens Boulevard back in 1977.  

As a public service, The Pen is Mightier the Person was able to magnify the Koch flyer to a degree where its author's identity is obvious:

In case your reading glasses just failed you, here is the above text, which makes some eerie and familiar references to teachers:  

There are much worst things in store for New York State if Koch ever became governor. If Koch ever became governor he would force schools, both private and public, all over the state to hire homosexual child-molesters as teachers. He has already shown, at the very least, that he has no objection to homosexual child-molesting in the public schools. Recently some New York City public school teachers went on record publicly identifying themselves and coming out in favor of the "right" of male teachers to commit sodomy on underage boys. The only reservation these teachers have is that sodomy should not take place in the school itself and it should not occur between a teacher and his own students.

It seems Andy was just as concerned about perverted teachers in 1977 as he was in 2014. But don't think for a second that Cuomo's concern sprang from some gallant desire to protect children from abuse. No, Cuomo's concern was all about getting and keeping power - for his father in 1977, and for himself in 2014.

Like any cynical politician, Andy Cuomo tries to use fear to enrage and activate the electorate. Fear of gays, fear of predatory teachers - these are fair to inflame when the governor's mansion is at stake.     

Cuomo recently fired up this fear once again in his Democratic primary race against Cynthia Nixon. This time, Cuomo had his goons in the New York Democratic Party mail an anonymous flyer to Queens Boulevard, and many parts beyond:

Conceived by Cuomo, paid for by the New York Democratic Committee 

     
In the spirit of the Jewish New Year, Cuomo thought manipulating legitimate fears of anti-Semitism was a good way to win a third term as governor. The problem with this, among many other problems, is that Cynthia Nixon is so anti-Semitic that she's raising her kids as Jews. 

Since 1977, Andy Cuomo has used slime to ensnare voters and elevate his ego. Sadly, New Yorkers only have themselves to blame, as voter turnout has been pathetically low.

And though Nixon's chances of beating Cuomo are about as good as hitting three home runs in a World Series game, if enough people vote for the Homo and not the Cuomo, civility will win the day once again.

Cuomo Names Mulgrew President of NYSUT (Updated)

Cuomo and Mulgrew: Together Again

New York Governor Andy Cuomo recently emerged at a Queens high school to name Michael Mulgrew the new president of NYSUT, the statewide teachers union. That's right:

"Thank you very much. What a pleasure, what a treat. First, to Michael Mulgrew, who is head of the teachers union statewide, who does an amazing job. Why? Because he really believes in what he's doing."  

Dozens of NYSUT members were shocked to learn that Karen Magee is no longer their president. Consequently, since no working teacher beyond Baychester or Bayside actually voted for Mulgrew, thousands of NYSUT members were disenfranchised in one fell swoop. 

Mulgrew said he's enjoyed his time as President of the United Federation of Teachers (UFT) and will stay on until a suitable slug replacement is found. 

In the meantime, NYSUT members should prepare themselves for more giant check photo ops with Cuomo, and .03% of teachers will even win a $5,000 stipend for PD classes from the Lobbyist for the Students. Nevermind your tenure and pension; they aren't as important as Cuomo's political career. 

And those pondering the legality of Mulgrew's promotion should stop right there. For an obscure clause in the NYSUT Constitution states that any NYSUT member who has lunch with the governor as often as Mulgrew shall be president by default.

NYSUT's battles are now Mulgrew's battles, and its motto in 2017 and beyond will be "victory" assuming the state's constitution is rewritten to steal collective bargaining rights and pensions.

Cuomo also thanked NYSUT for its generous contributions to the New York Democrats, his political slush fund. With the help of Mulgrew and even more delicious lunches, Cuomo just wants to say "I love you" to teachers before he screws them over--once again.

Update: Predictably, reaction to this story was swift and skeptical, prompting Cuomo to reaffirm Mulgrew's promotion at yet another giant check photo op, this time at an elementary school in Brooklyn:

First, to the gentleman who you just heard speak. His name is Michael Mulgrew. He is in charge of all the teachers all across the state of New York, and he is a great champion for them, and he works night and day, and he does a fantastic job, so let's give him a big round of applause and a big cheer, he should get a big cheer, Michael, give Michael a big cheer.  

Governor Andy fully intends to bask in even more cheers for Mulgrew in the months to come. After all, it's much nicer than answering questions about why Cuomo, the founder of the Women's Equality Party, decided to throw NYSUT's first female president under the Tampax Express.

At press time, Magee has yet to comment, and is apparently now pretending to be the president of NYSUT.  
        

Cuomo would much rather have lunch with Mulgrew than Magee     

Cuomo Appears at UFT Headquarters to Honor...Firefighters

Straining to burnish his Union bonafides, New York Governor Andy Cuomo recently appeared at the Manhattan headquarters of the United Federation of Teachers (UFT). Cuomo surfaced not in support of school teachers, however, but firefighters, who rightly received a rise in benefits with the stroke of a state-funded pen. 

Ironically, while claiming to care about workers, Cuomo cares nothing about working teachers. It seems Cuomo wants to knock teachers out of the middle class so he doesn't have to fight for them.

And it is an assault on decency that the UFT would even allow the Lobbyist for the Students within a block of Union headquarters--let alone inside--proclaiming himself a champion of justice for workers. In case the UFT has forgotten, Cuomo's idea of "justice" includes closing public schools and firing teachers due to destitute and dysfunctional families (otherwise known as low test scores).

Cuomo would also like to see teachers and their pensions disappear, signing his name to Tier VI and Tweets like this: 

Evidently, justice ends where Cuomo's enemies list begins. Those who dedicate their lives to children will dedicate their appetites to cat food in retirement if Cuomo has anything to do with it.    

Furthermore, a looming 2017 constitutional convention ballot initiative would give Cuomo and his slimy associates the chance to finally enshrine laws that screw anyone who's been mean to Governor Andy, like teachers. A revised New York Constitution might exclude those pesky public pensions once and for all, for example, and Cuomo can do to collective bargaining rights in New York what his brother-from-another-mother Scott Walker did to them in Wisconsin. 

Helping one group of workers while punishing another is not fairness, but moral malfeasance, and cruelty cancels any kindness. The UFT should remember this the next time they open their doors to a man who's harmed their profession more than any politician in state history.      

Local Control? New York Schools Need Not Apply

As things go, the 1998 film The Siege is remarkably prescient. Terrorist bombs and bullets bombard Manhattan as New York FBI agent Anthony Hubbard (Denzel Washington) gives way to the maniacal whims of President Trump U.S. Army Major General William Devereaux (Bruce Willis). Muslim males are concentrated into camps around the city and Hubbard must take his investigation underground--both to evade Devereaux's homicidal scrutiny and because his headquarters is blown up at the beginning of the movie.    

It's Hubbard's apparent ineptitude at stopping the terrorists which draws the ire of the feds in the first place, and he must find a way around the government's ignorant interventions to save his city.   

Lest anyone label this the stuff of hyperbole, it is marching across New York State today.

Albany, for instance, has developed a bizarre love-hate relationship with public education, promising to increase funding if--and only if--schools agree to implement Governor Sociopath Cuomo's latest teacher evaluation law (3012-d). Among other absurdities, Cuomo's plan counts standardized tests as 50% of a teacher's overall score, and includes a student "growth formula" that even Education Commissioner MaryEllen Elia has called "random." Add to this number classroom observations performed by people who will need a GPS to find your child's school.  

In other words, public education is careening toward a place where bureaucrats like Cuomo only allow it to exist on their terms instead of the terms of local communities. Firing teachers and closing "failing" schools will only increase unless people shut up, take the Tests, and admit, "It is what is."

Sadly, NYSUT's promise to "seek" local control is closer to fiction than The Siege. The Union has voiced tepid opposition to Cuomo's attempts to trample workers' rights and test kids into conformity. Tortured Tweets aside, Executive Vice President Andy Pallotta conspicuously excluded references to 3012-d in his annual address to the state legislature, but can't wait to tell you how great Hillary Clinton is.

In addition, UFT President Michael Mulgrew, who controls some 800 delegates to NYSUT's annual representative assembly and thus essentially controls how the Union votes --shamelessly proclaimed that a teacher's job should ride on test scores because principals cannot be trusted to do their jobs. It seems Mulgrew likes his chances with the demons of junk science more than the better angels of humanity. Paradoxically, Mulgrew also tried to take credit for Cuomo's meaningless "moratorium" on test-and-punish, and even placed a pricey ad that touted the UFT's bogus victory.

Any progress against the privatization of public education in New York, however, is thanks to thousands of prudent parents who've refused to expose their children to Cuomo's toxic tests. Unfortunately, Mulgrew's litany of lunches with the Lobbyist for the Students--access which no other NYSUT president knows--has only spread dysentery to schools throughout the state, as they must take another bite out of Cuomo's shit sandwich or starve to death--whichever comes first.  

NYSUT members outside of the UFT who dare question Mulgrew's malfeasance are accused of violating the "autonomy" of the Union's largest local. After all, there's a UFT election coming up, and teachers from Gloversville to Hicksville should just stay out of it; it's not like Mulgrew's autonomy has ever allowed him to fuck things up for the rest of the state.

But what say defenders of the UFT's recent $100,000 donation to a man named Ted O'Brien, a failed candidate for the state senate in the Rochester area, some 350 miles beyond the UFT's autonomy? The donation was allegedly part of an asinine scheme by New York City Mayor Bill DeBlasio to raise money for distant Democrats. Is meddling in corrupt state elections less offensive than meddling in union elections?

Should UFT members think twice before funding the futile campaigns of candidates who live closer to Canada than Corona? Do UFT members even know what their money is being spent on? Maybe the U.S. attorney can clear this up.

Mulgrew and DeBlasio: Felonious Fellas?

Like a child needs a family, public education needs local control. The more control that schools surrender to ambitious idiots (i.e. New York politicians), the deeper our divisions delve. As we enter the Idiocracy, we must not let idiots divide us.

Rather, parents, teachers, and students must tell the likes of Cuomo and Mulgrew that their authority ends now.

Give our schools liberty, or give them insolvency.


         

Beware the Ides of Testing

Great news, New York! Your kids will have the chance to take standardized tests even earlier next year! The New York Education Department (NYSED) has ruled that the Big Tests will now go down in March instead of the usual April. Note to white suburban moms: the tests will no longer interfere with soccer season!

And it's no coincidence that Governor Cuomo's annual budget will now be due after the tests instead of before. After all, Cuomo was hoisted by the petards of his budget last year when draconian changes to his teacher evaluation law (APPR) enflamed the Opt-Out movement. Since then, Cuomo has correctly yet bizarrely credited himself for the dramatic spike in test refusals, announcing that his asinine education laws "increased parental participation."    

With the winds of Opt-Out now at his back instead of his face, the Lobbyist for the Students will try to ram whatever other "reforms" he can down our throats without too much gagging. Cuomo and his slimy associates count on parents and teachers having short memories when it comes to education laws passed in the middle of the night.

New Yorkers have longer memories than Cuomo thinks, however, and will not soon forget last year's pernicious attacks on their kids and communities. Whether in March, April, or any other time of year, refusing Cuomo's abusive tests strikes at the heel of an education agenda that is bankrolled by billionaires.

Opt-Out must not relent until lawmakers do their jobs and bring the Test and Punish era to an inglorious end.

Don't be Fooled by Cuomo's Mea Culpa on Testing

As New York Governor Andrew Cuomo pretends to listen to parents and teachers, he hopes they don't know how to read.

Buried at the bottom of a recent press release announcing the "recommendations" of his education task farce is proof that Cuomo is open to changing nothing: 

The Education Transformation Act of 2015 will remain in place, and no new legislation is required to implement the recommendations of the report, including recommendations regarding the transition period for consequences for students and teachers. During the transition, the 18 percent of teachers whose performance is measured, in part, by Common Core tests will use different local measures approved by the state, similar to the measures already being used by the majority of teachers. 

Yes, tests will still count for 50% of a teacher's evaluation.

The so-called “local measures" will require the state’s seal of approval, and the cut-points on the convoluted “matrix” that determines if teachers keep their jobs will be tweaked just enough so heads roll—regardless of how “fair” the tests appear. Moreover, the number of tests will double as students will take one test to grade their teachers, and one test that will, according to Cuomo, be "meaningless" until the 2019-2020 school year. So much for reducing the amount of testing. 

School districts can now expect a full-court press by Cuomo and his slimy associates to convince them to agree to his asinine teacher evaluation law (APPR) or lose more funding. After all, the (Common Core) tests won't count for another four years, even though communities and careers will still depend on tests.   

Additionally, everything else in the Lobbyist for the Student's infamous Education Transformation Act remains, including receivership and weakened due process rights. As Cuomo maintains, the law will not change. The test is still king.   

   

Though federal law now says states don't have to use test scores to rate teachers, Cuomo doesn't care. He will use any means necessary to break public education and hand the pieces over to his Wall Street donors. Cuomo is too greedy and prideful to try to save face. 

Education historian Diane Ravitch recently wondered why Cuomo thinks he can control education since the New York State Constitution grants that power to the Board of Regents, not the governor. Cuomo gets control by linking ludicrous laws to budgets which are rammed though in the middle of the night. As he once said, he is the government, and public education and all of its democracy threatens Cuomo's control.   

It's time for spineless, heavy-hearted legislators to take control away from Cuomo and ram through legislation on behalf of the communities they claim to represent. 

Nothing short of a complete rebuke of Cuomo's toxic agenda will stop 500,000 test refusals now. 

On Cuomo and Incompetency Based Education

Like sweet soma in Aldous Huxley's dystopian novel Brave New World, a dose of "competency based" education has arrived to pacify the public.

Rather than with super-sized standardized tests taken once a year—tests which are less popular than purgatory—the profiteers of public education now seek to lure schools into oblivion via the sirens of software.

If the plutocrats get their way—and they usually do—steaming piles of tests will be served even more frequently, albeit sealed in smaller, digital packages. The fates of schools will ride on kids' keyboards, as each log-in will at long last expose the incompetency of their principals and teachers. 

With No. 2 pencils soon going the way of pay phones and mix tapes, politicians will call for even more computers inside (and out of) the classroom. Besides, it's the 21st century, and technology is finally smarter than people. Tying teacher evaluations to computer-based tests will make sense to many, at least at first. Kids will enthusiastically complete tasks formerly known as high-stakes tests and be cajoled by computers into achieving proficiency.

Over time, however, this will become a fool's errand; the "bar will rise" just enough to placate parents and turn effective teachers ineffective. Educators will also ironically have no choice but to embrace this software since their careers will depend on it. Computers will spew forth weekly ratings of teachers and schools that will make Bill Gates swoon. Meanwhile, companies like Pearson, Questar and Google will collect pearls of data on our kids, for sale on the open market.  

Though the opt-out movement has apparently burrowed deep enough beneath the skin of New York Governor Andrew Cuomo that the Lobbyist for the Students is reportedly considering amending his test-centric teacher evaluation law (APPR), it remains to be seen what, if anything, will actually change. All signs point to Cuomo once again including education "reforms" in the state budget—a cynical and selfish ploy which leaves schools in the hands of the infamous three men in a room.

If Cuomo was serious about improving education, he would compel the legislature to take up changes to his APPR immediately instead of five minutes before the budget's due.

Embedding education in the budget has forced heavy-hearted legislators to either forsake funding or vote for ludicrous laws they don't even read. And though Cuomo has hinted that he now wants nothing to do with high-stakes tests, don't be surprised if the words "technology" and "competency" are peppered throughout his proposals. Cuomo may indeed offer to remove traditional tests in exchange for competency based benchmarks, technology touchstones or pathways to proficiency; he's still searching for the right euphemism. As usual, all of this will come at a cost, with districts who agree to these deforms promised increased bandwidths and refurbished iPads. Sleazy budgetary bribes are how Cuomo "gets things done", after all.

It was just ten days ago that Cuomo expressed a desire to replace teachers with computers.  Parents and teachers must therefore verify but not trust his overtures on education, be they from anonymous "administration officials" (i.e. Cuomo) or Cuomo himself.

And if Cuomo thinks computers are the answer, he should first try replacing himself with one. 

The College and Career Readiness is All

A recent report by anti-public schools group StudentsFirstNY alleges that New York City schools are passing too many kids. The charter school charlatans request "an independent audit of school coursework to ensure New York City public schools are not lowering the bar and giving parents a false picture." 

Translation: Give us your schools.

And exactly what data do they use to support this claim of "scandalous" grade inflation? Yes, results from tests which over 250,o00 New Yorkers refused to take last year, tests intended to measure readiness for community colleges and careers.

How does New York State define "college and career readiness", anyway? Not even education commissioner MaryEllen Elia seems to know, though she does agree that the teacher evaluation system (APPR) is "random."

The truth is, thanks to College Board President David Coleman—yet another education "expert" who taught for zero seconds—only kids on track to score a 1630 on the SAT are apparently prepared for life beyond high school. Coleman pulled this number from his rear in 2013 when the New York State Education Department (NYSED) needed hard evidence that public schools were indeed "failing." Never mind that only 34% of kids who take the SAT score a 1630, or to what degree financial success equates with college and career readiness; Coleman had the cure. 

Though not quite "independent", the "audit of school coursework" StudentsFirstNY seeks is already well underway. After all, charter school bootlicker Governor Andrew Cuomo has used the same bogus test scores to justify his recent education "reforms" encased in the budget. So alarmed was Cuomo by the lack of college and career readiness in his state he decided to use tests he recently called "meaningless" as an excuse to shutter schools, fire middle class workers and paint a "false picture" of public education.

Now, with a twirl that would make a ballerina blush, Cuomo reportedly wants to stop using tests to destroy public education. The Lobbyist for the Students is evidently entombed in low poll numbers and needs working families to break him out. But don't be fooled: Cuomo merely wants to somehow swap standardized tests with "technology" to fire veteran teachers and steal their pensions. Maybe heavy hearted legislators like Jeffrey Dinowitz (D-Bronx) will at least sniff the budget before they vote for it this year:

Something's rotten in Jeffrey Dinowitz's New York

With one putrid vote, Dinowitz—who New York State United Teachers (NYSUT) has generously supported over the years—helped bring high-stakes tests, receivership, and weakened rights for workers to New York State.

How did NYSUT respond to Dinowitz? By publicly thanking him with a glossy mailer, of course. 

Rather than condoning the budget votes of Dinowitz and others, NYSUT would better serve teachers, parents and students by loudly repeating the following question the next time the likes of StudentsFirstNY accuses our schools of "lowering the bar":

How does New York define college and career readiness? 

If the answer has anything to do with test scores, NYSUT wins the argument.        

The Good, the Bad and the Putrid

This blog has never been about a person. It's about ideas—the good, the bad and the putrid.

However, people who stunt good ideas and try to graft putrid ones upon them are regularly rebuked in this blog. Take New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, for example, whose inane quest to grind public schools into the ground continues unabated, as demonstrated by recent statements that this blog was the first to report on. Consider what you will about Cuomo the person, but Cuomo the politician has even more ideas for public education, ideas that should alarm many New Yorkers.  

Though Cuomo has yet to comment on the ideas in this blog, another Andy would like to make The Pen is Mightier than the Person about the person.

At a recent New York State United Teachers (NYSUT) Board of Directors meeting, NYSUT executive vice president Andy Pallotta announced that he had called the state attorney general to file a discrimination complaint against this blog, claiming that a recent post likens him to a character from the film Goodfellas. Like a few dozen other enthusiastic readers, Pallotta subjected the piece to a semi-rigorous close-reading and instantly identified with it, even though his actual name or likeness appears nowhere in the piece. Satire is wasted on the stupid, evidently, though Martin Scorsese's film and the blog, if anything, attempt to unearth a theme that often offends people in power: follow the money.

Does Pallotta's absurd attempt to censor this blog mean he's offended? Most likely. Is Pallotta offended by following the money? Let's hope he addresses this in his next lecture on unions and organized crime.

The fact remains, as NYSUT's director of political operations, Pallotta holds power over a lot of money, money that dues-paying members have every right to see is wisely spent.

Since high-stakes tests are the lynch pin of privatization, for example, NYSUT can and should do more to wield the bully pulpit and pocketbook against them. Pallotta and others might begin this campaign by at least asking teachers if they realize that their careers now essentially ride on students getting a 1630 on the SAT—New York State's asinine definition of "college and career readiness." NYSUT might then be in a better position to encourage members not to have their children take the tests—in solidarity with thousands of exasperated parents around the state.

With a decision looming in Friedrichs v. California Teachers Association, NYSUT must prepare for the worst and hope for the best. If and when dues become optional, thousands of working teachers will need more persuasive reasons to opt-in than saving a few dollars on patio furniture or dancing the nae nae.

People will join a Union that can be seen and heard fighting against the dismantlement of their schools, a Union that vigorously counters the putrid with the good. 

We look forward to hearing Pallotta's ideas. 

Cuomo Wants to Replace Machines with Technology

Huh?

In a recent interview at Harvard's Kennedy School of Government, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo continued his assault on public education, logic and the English language: 

I was watching some crazy science fiction movie the other night, I couldn't sleep. And this person designs a computer that becomes smarter than the person. And he's trying to tell the computer to do something and it's telling him, "I'm overriding and I'm [inaudible]."

That's what we created. We created a government machine that we say, "We want to make a change in how we educate students...and the bureaucracy says, "No. We like it the way it is." And you say, "Yeah but you're my machine, I built you and I operate you." And the machine says, "Not anymore you don't."  

I hope technology can come in over that. And technology can almost say, "Forget the machine, forget the machine. You know how we're going to do education now? Every kid gets a computer. That computer has a piece of software that adjusts to that child and how that child learns. And that technology is going to fundamentally change the dynamic of the classroom."       

The movie which kept Cuomo awake sounds a lot like Stanley Kubrick's 2001: A Space Odyssey. The film features a computer named HAL 9000 which rebels against its operator on a voyage to Jupiter.

Though Kubrick's film points out the pitfalls of technology, Cuomo bizarrely uses it to praise technology and chide human beings. Cuomo apparently wants to replace teachers—who he compares to machines—with yes, actual machines.

As if our kids aren't already hooked on devices, Cuomo—who was a teacher for zero seconds—wants them staring at screens for at least 8 hours a day. The Lobbyist for the Students and other public education deformers envision classrooms of 50 or more students pointing and clicking their way into dreary, automated futures. And you can forget about them forming relationships with other children or compassionate adults—their best friend will be an iPad.

It's unsettling to consider that Cuomo might actually believe a "piece of software" can do a better job at educating our kids. What's more disturbing, however, is that he sees technology as a means to a destructive end. After all, Cuomo's goal all along has been to "break" the teachers union, and believes technology can help him achieve this while also enriching his campaign donors. Cuomo's slimy crusade against working teachers brought us last year's Smart Schools bond, for example, which spends $2 billion on educational technology, and Dick Parsons, the curmudgeonly head of Cuomo's Common Core Task Force who just happens to work for an educational technology firm. Cuomo condones turning our kids into drones as long as people like Parsons get their cut.

Teachers unions were not the inspiration for HAL 9000, but rather politicians like Andrew Cuomo, who choose to pass laws first and ask questions later. And if Cuomo thinks he can once again use his budget to "change the dynamic of the classroom", he should first try answering HAL's question:

NY Education Commissioner Calls Teacher Evaluation System "Random"

At a recent meeting in Albany, New York State education commissioner MaryEllen Elia called the state’s teacher evaluation law “random" and could not explain just how her department determines so-called “college and career readiness.”

Welcome to New York, where Andrew Cuomo has stacked the bullshit so high it can be seen and smelled from outer space.   

It should reassure no one, however, that Elia—who Cuomo handpicked to enforce his asinine education laws—can give no good reasons why high-stakes tests should not cease and desist; for the profitizers of public education have thrown empirical evidence overboard in dragging us to the depths of their hubris and greed.

In the name of “equality”—but at the expense of justice—more schools must be closed and more teachers must be fired. It is the only way Cuomo’s donors can feel better about themselves and their portfolios. Students are to be siphoned and sorted by standardized tests, the only data that matters to the Lobbyist for the Students, even though he recently called the tests “meaningless.”

So what if no one wants to become a teacher in a few years? Computers will give the weakest children a more “personalized” education anyway and can be evaluated via less random updates to their operating systems.

As for the Holy Grail of education deform—“college and career readiness”—should we not be concerned when children are ready for colleges and careers, but choose neither? What then? Have their teachers failed them? Is it possible that maybe, just maybe, education means something beyond financial success?

On the other hand, should we not be concerned that the careers of thousands of middle class workers hang in the balance, all because a few ass clowns in Albany are convinced that being ready for life means getting a 1630 on the SAT?

Public education is under assault by a confluence of affluence and ignorance. And though leaders like Obama and Cuomo have feigned concern by rolling out comical committees and “testing action plans”, nothing will change until these leaders and their lackeys are rolled out of office for enabling the false philanthropy of education deform.

And with the Opt Out movement poised to gain even more traction in 2016, possibly reaching 500,000 test refusals, the chances of this happening may be less random than we think.
  

Cuomo to Sign “Cilantro on Shit” Standards into Law

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo is sick of the Common Core. So much so, he’s formed another panel to “reboot” the controversial standards, and has even recruited former banker Dick Parsons to once again lead the charge.

Though the panel has yet to meet, their report is in—and it’s not pretty for New York schools.  

According to sources close to the panel, Cuomo will include virtually all of the panel’s recommendations in this year’s state budget—a budget which he fully expects most legislators will not even read. 

Dubbed the “Cilantro on Shit” standards (Cuomo has nothing against cilantro, though he may yet change the name), the new Cuomo standards include the following:

COS2.09: Parents, teachers and students must not question the standards. Those who do shall be told, “It is what it is.” 

COS4.04: Anyone who calls the standards “Cuomo Core 3.0” will be subject to arrest and deportation from the state.

COS4.7: Parents whose children refuse to take Cilantro on Shit tests—for any reason—must pay $500 per child for each test day missed.

COS9.11: Since teachers are likely to have their own children refuse Cilantro on Shit tests, as of 2016, any person employed in the State of New York as a teacher may no longer have kids.

New York State United Teachers (NYSUT) President Karen Magee issued the following statement in response to Cuomo’s latest education reforms:

NYSUT would like to thank Governor Cuomo for fucking us over once again. Now that the standards are law, educators will take them even more seriously. And though working teachers have a lot more to lose than me, including their careers and pensions, NYSUT will not stand in the way of the standards; rather, NYSUT will work tirelessly to ignore members who call on the Union to lead New York’s kids and communities out of the morass of high stakes tests. NYSUT also encourages everyone to dance the Nae Nae, since we believe it is the only way to reclaim the promise of public education.

At press time, Cuomo's office has declined to comment on this story. 

Memo to New Yorkers: Watch What Cuomo Does, Not What He Pretends To Do

New York lost a labor legend this week with the death of Thomas Kavunedus, one of the few who many can thank for keeping contracts current whenever ass clowns from Albany decide to wreak havoc on middle class workers. 

Kavunedus, a retired member of the Lakeland Federation of Teachers (LFT), spent 16 days in jail in 1977 during the longest teachers strike in state history. Most credit Kavunedus and seven other imprisoned members of the LFT for helping to bring the Triborough Amendment to New York State--a law which maintains salaries and job protections for workers if and when contracts expire.

Without the Triborough Amendment, lives and livelihoods could be shredded along with hard-fought contracts, with people held at the mercy of politicians and plutocrats who've made a sport of blaming economic downturns on "greedy" public servants.  

While the passage of his draconian teacher and school evaluation plan puts Governor Andrew Cuomo on the warpath against the Triborough Amendment, many unions outside of education do not seem to care...yet.

Union leaders of all stripes should seethe at Cuomo's blatant disregard for local, collectively-bargained work rules via his asinine "reforms" imposed on school districts across the state.

In addition to teachers, Cuomo's plan also subjects nurses, custodians, and cafeteria workers--to name a few--to even more job insecurity and uncertainty, as schools in receivership will likely be run by proteges of Wisconsin Governor and Cuomo's brother-from-another-mother Scott Walker.

Worst of all, Cuomo Core will wield standardized tests to pollute and uproot bountiful learning environments for our kids and communities.        

Speaking of labor leaders who should care, consider Patrick "Blood on the Steps of City Hall" Lynch, President of the Patrolman's Benevolent Association (PBA).

Though thousands of New York City cops list teachers as family members, Lynch recently awarded Cuomo the PBA's "Man of the Year" award. It seems Lynch condones Cuomo's destruction of public education as long as Cuomo throws him a plastic bone now and again.

For example, Cuomo says cops should be paid more while while doing absolutely nothing about it. In fact, Cuomo has worked harder to pay public servants less than he has to pay them more. 

Consider also Cuomo's proposal to raise the minimum wage, yet another reason to watch what Cuomo does, and not what he pretends to do.

With a $15 minimum enacted for fast-food workers by another Cuomission, the Fight for Fifteen is over for Cuomo; he can now claim that at least fast-food workers got a raise if and when his proposal goes down in a hail of more tax cuts for his billionaire buddies.

Cuomo's playing with house money on the minimum wage, after all, and his donors will still benefit while McDonald's cashiers are replaced by iPads.

The death of Thomas Kavunedus should remind us--yet again--of where we've been, and where we're headed.

Labor needs leaders like Kavunedus--now more than ever--to fight for its life and legacy. 

                                                      

Education and Incarceration in the Brave New Nation

In a 1949 letter to George Orwell, Aldous Huxley wrote:

Within the next generation I believe that the world’s rulers will discover that infant conditioning and narco-hypnosis are more efficient, as instruments of government, than clubs and prisons, and that the lust for power can be just as completely satisfied by suggesting people into loving their servitude as by flogging and kicking them into obedience.

More prescient words have rarely been written.

Though nothing new, the kindness and cruelty our leaders use to persuade the populace is maturing into something frightening these days in the United States, where it rages like bi-polar twins at a family reunion.

Thanks to the Citizens United decision, the same billionaires who own the Big Banks and Big Media also own the politicians, and Huxley's "instruments of government" drip from drums of tear gas and glossy political ads.

Government officials around the country wave diseased olive branches and dollars in the face of the Opt Out Movement, for example, while sharpening arrows for anyone on the streets after dark.

In New York State, newly-minted education commissioner and Mrs. Doubtfire’s sister-from-another-mister MaryEllen Elia thinks parents and communities just don’t understand why the state must continue clubbing our kids and their schools with inane standardized tests.  The commissioner believes people can still fall in love with tests whose sole purpose is to enrich plutocrats on the sweat of students and middle-class workers.  The unelected Elia holds an olive branch in one hand and a fist in the other, threatening to coax people into submission if she cannot cajole them first.

With the number of students refusing to take the federally-mandated tests quadrupling in one year, the commissioner, Regents Chancellor Merryl Tisch, and even Governor Andrew Cuomo have to realize that the horses are out of the barn, but they will try—at least for now—to corral them using the pricey tools of public relations instead of the tools of incarceration. Charlatans like Jeremiah "I'm not an Educator" Kittredge from Families for Excellent Schools and Jenny Sedlis from StudentsFirstNY, for instance, will continue spewing forth commercials promoting Cuomo Core and fraudulent vulture charter schools.       

Try as they may, NYSED will not sweep away the Refuse movement.

Speaking of Cuomo and incarceration, the governor and other leaders for that matter have been silent about tactics within the state's prisons that would make Dick Cheney blush.  A recent report in The New York Times details what took place at the Clinton Correctional Facility in the aftermath of the infamous escape of two convicted murderers, when officials allegedly tried to beat information out of inmates, and yes, even threatened to waterboard them if they didn't comply.  

To make matters worse, during his jaunt through the jail, the Lobbyist for the Students was filmed talking to an inmate, and punctuated his monologue with his "best tough-guy stare", according to the inmate. 

Just hours later, the same inmate was handcuffed and bludgeoned in a broom closet by guards who wore no name badges.

"Right this way, sir."

When someone is tortured shortly after the state's most powerful elected leader stared him down, in the words of comedian Jerry Seinfeld, "that's not going to be good for anybody." 

Contrary to the whims of groups like the National Urban League—who recently gave Cuomo an award for “leadership in criminal justice reform", ordinary Americans face heavy-handed, heavily-funded efforts by Cuomo and others for opting out and speaking out.

And while Cuomo may be proud of shutting down some of the prisons his father opened, it didn't stop him from recently shutting down the mouth of activist Allen Roskoff. Roskoff, President of the Jim Owls Liberal Democratic Club, was arrested for disrupting an event where Cuomo received another bogus award, this time for his "progressive leadership."

Evidently, modern progressivism entails attacking public education and the First Amendment, among other things.

Roskoff ( 2nd from l.) was even more shocked to end up in a blue and white.  

Across the country, bullies abound. But they are not merely confined to buses and school locker rooms. They also lurk in state houses and corporate boardrooms, quick to shove verdicts and public policies down people's throats before they even smell them.

It is a lust for power like no other, since the technology of today is like no other. Huxley's "infant conditioning" and "narco-hypnosis" come standard on iPads and in bottles of prescription pills, after all.

And it is also not surprising that Commissioner Elia vows the tests will be embraced once they're computerized; technology has a knack for lulling many into submission.

And if they can't lull us into submission, they'll beat us.
 

On the Road to Receivership

A recent $8.5 million donation to Evil Moskowitz’s torture chambers charter schools by billionaire hedge funder John Paulson is a mere bubble amid the tsunami of Big Money careening toward public education in New York State. It’s doubtless Paulson would have donated at least twice that amount had Andrew “I am the Government” Cuomo not failed to enrich Paulson and other Wall St. wankers via another one of his tax-cuts-for-billionaires bills.  

Alas, the Lobbyist for the Student’s dubiously-dubbed “Parental Choice in Education Act” did not even come to a vote, though Cuomo did manage to slip a few more charter schools for his slimy associates into Albany’s putrid package of legislation. Cuomo continues to “get things done” by ramming through ludicrous laws before most legislators even have a chance to put their reading glasses on.   

Contrary to what The New York Times says, Paulson’s donation will not cause New York City Mayor Bill DeBlasio additional angst in accommodating Moskowitz’s schools—Cuomo already carved out space for them in the state budget through seemingly unrelated legislation.

Under a new “school receivership” law encased in the budget, Moskowitz and other public school predators are now clear to subsume “failing” schools within one year, kicking union contracts and our most vulnerable kids to the curb. After all, neither Moskowitz nor Paulson’s money will tolerate low Cuomo Core test scores. Kids who happen to struggle because their parents are destitute, disabled or dead will be out of luck; rather than fitted for a charter school uniform, they will be promised all the knowledge in the world via asinine online classes on a refurbished iPad. 

The good news is that many intelligent people understand that test scores do not define children, or teachers for that matter. Paulson and other education misanthropists should remember this the next time they agonize over the worthlessness of their worth and attempt to live vicariously through other people's kids. It’s not our fault that Paulson decided to become a billionaire and now needs another reason to exist besides money. Perhaps his fortune would be better spent saving lions in Africa. 

Billionaire John Paulson is now in the market for a soul

Awash in ignorant hubris, Paulson’s beneficence also helps destroy those precious middle-class jobs politicians like to tout, as the faculty and staff in charter schools have less job security than a drunken babysitter. Yes, public schools are similar to corporations in that they also provide jobs to the community, jobs politicians from both parties are desperate to downgrade.

Fortunately, more people are paying attention. One of the largest acts of civil disobedience took place this year in New York when over 200,000 ordinary citizens decided they would refuse to allow their kids to participate in Andrew Cuomo’s greedy and vindictive quest to destroy their schools with standardized tests. This number will only increase next year as more people start to realize that the road to receivership is paved with low test scores. If Moskowitz and others continue to get their way, this road will soon crisscross the state, with hundreds of schools labelled as “failing” and in need of a Paulson donation.

Besides an attempt at fumigating college readiness standards that are more toxic than Chernobyl on a windy day, the state’s only answer for the Refuse movement will be to intimidate and punish any teacher suspected of supporting the uprising. Cuomo’s Orwellian “moral character” law contained in the budget is clearly meant for this purpose, as our sociopathic leader’s definition of immorality pertains to anyone who challenges his ego. How many teachers, for example, will the state try to railroad out of the profession because they "like" a status on Facebook?

History shows, however, that people don't digest force-fed injustices very well, especially ones that include children and hard-working teachers as their ingredients.

Paradoxically, injustice also breeds solidarity, and it is now the job of everyone who cares about public education—from bus drivers to board members—to coalesce around the Refuse movement. Refuse the road to receivership by refusing the tests.

It is the only way to save our schools from the clutches of strife.